Three steps to making meaningful New Year’s Resolutions

There’s no doubt that it’s mentally satisfying using the turn of the year to make a change or try something new. However, fast-forward to February and often these lofty ambitions are beginning to fall a little flat. Why is that?

Psychology supports setting New Year’s Resolutions when done in the right way. Setting stretching personal goals is motivating. With a focus on learning and growth, New Year’s Resolutions can increase our sense of satisfaction and fulfilment. However, psychology also sheds light on why they can go wrong. One reason is that we can get caught up in others’ good intentions instead of tuning more closely into why the change we’re trying to make is personally important.

Here are three simple steps to help you make your 2023 New Year’s Resolutions more meaningful:

Write down up to five things that brought you joy in 2022

Too often we rush into setting goals without first reflecting on what’s gone well up until now. This is psychologically important because self-appreciation helps to create healthy mental models in the brain which in turn make it easier to notice the positives in life. It’s also a quick way of checking in on our personal values, which can then be used to guide our choices going forward. These five things can be as big or as small as you like, from the adrenaline rush of a new business win to the warmth of a cuddle from your children at bedtime. Consider what these five moments of joy from 2022 tell you about your personal priorities for 2023.

Identify one life area you’d like to give more attention to in 2023

The wheel of life is a coaching psychology tool used to help you think about your current balance across different life areas, such as: family, health, work, relationships, and personal growth. Start by creating your wheel of life categories. Different areas require different amounts of attention and energy, depending on which of life’s seasons you’re currently in. The aim is not to give an equal amount of time to each category. Rather, to help you define a meaningful New Year’s Resolution that’s aligned to your values, consider which category is most important for you to focus on first in 2023. Visualise what success will look like for you – what will you be doing more of, less of and differently to the way you’re living now. Take a photo of your visual on your phone, or pin it up somewhere you’ll see it frequently, to help remind and support your brain to do something different. 

Define one specific action that will move you closer towards this

Once you have a clear focus for your New Year’s Resolution, it’s time to define one specific action that will move you closer towards your vision of success. It’s important to be realistic; start small and build momentum over time. To break existing habits that could lead you down a different path, consider adding simple rituals and routines that will help to interrupt this way of thinking. For example, break a mid-morning biscuit habit by washing a fresh piece of fruit each morning. This helps to create new pathways in the brain that support long-lasting behavioural change. This process might also involve making a decision to press pause on certain tasks in favour of those more closely aligned to what’s most important to you right now.

Jayne Ruff – Chartered Occupational Psychologist & Founder of Parenting Point.

Parenting Point exists to give everyone the self-belief that they can flourish as a parent and a professional by positively aligning both worlds. We help parents find their meaningful and fulfilling work-life balance through practical, psychology-based workshops and coaching. We work with organisations to create positive and inclusive performance cultures that support and encourage the growth of working parents.